Category Archives: Relationships

From Surviving to Thriving: how EMDR can help you put the past in the past

Something devastating happened to you. Maybe it was yesterday.  Maybe it was fifty years ago.  You got through it…somehow, but it keeps haunting you.  Small, everyday things can remind you of it, bringing back images, sensations, feelings, sounds, beliefs about … Continue reading

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Feeling Emotionally and Physically Drained? Tip #2: Getting energy from your worries

Feeling emotionally and physically drained?  In my last post, I talked about the amazing pool of energy available to you by loving yourself.  Giving yourself permission to care about your own needs and welfare is the first tool for getting … Continue reading

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Communicate Your Feelings Effectively… In 2 Simple Sentences

When our feelings flare up, we tend to communicate our feelings in the least effective way: we blame, criticize, manipulate, or demand.  The problem feels like the OTHER person’s actions, which we view as “causing” our hurt or angry feelings. … Continue reading

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Why Can’t My Partner Listen To Me?! How understanding your partner can be threatening – and what to do about it.

“I don’t get it,” says a 30-something woman in my office. “He doesn’t seem to hear what I am saying. I can tell him over and over again how I am feeling, and he just sits there or disagrees. It’s … Continue reading

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Regaining Your Connection Through Couples Therapy

You used to be amazing together. You were open, supportive, understanding… passionate. Somehow, it changed. Maybe you have been drifting away from each other. Maybe you fight too often, or struggle with betrayal. You want to recreate that secure, close, … Continue reading

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The Shared Trauma of 9-11

On this infamous day eleven years ago, we each experienced something shockingly terrible.  Many of us vividly remember seeing the plane going into the towers, the towers crashing down, the people running through the streets of New York with clouds … Continue reading

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The “T” in LGBT: What does “transgender” mean?

Imagine going into surgery for an appendectomy.  When you come back to consciousness after surgery, you realize that something is different: you have been mistakenly given gender confirmation surgery. How do you feel?  If you are not upset about it, maybe you … Continue reading

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WARNING: Being an Attorney May be Hazardous to Your (Mental) Health – Part II

Attorneys tend to far more depressed, anxious, unhappy, and even suicidal than most other professions.  In Part I of this series, I listed some of the gruesome mental health statistics for attorneys, as well as the possible explanations.  Now that … Continue reading

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Provocateur, Mirror, Healer: how your partner can help you grow

“A person hasn’t any idea what their soul looks like until they gaze into the eyes of the person that they’re married to. And then, if they’re any kind of decent human being, they spend the next couple of days … Continue reading

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Stop Playing and Start Communicating

I have frequently called the beginning stages of a relationship the Ouija board effect, where slight moves from either member of the couple can move the other member in that same direction (e.g., toward or away from the relationship), which … Continue reading

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